When a Good Girl Starts to Hurt: What Her Stomach Is Trying to Say (IBS, Teengirls, Chronic stomach pain)

IBS in teenage girls is often linked to emotional stress, trauma, and chronic people-pleasing. When girls suppress emotions and try to stay “perfect,” their nervous systems become dysregulated, triggering gut symptoms like stomach pain, heartburn, nausea, or vomiting

As a Teen, My Stomach Hurt More Than I Let On

I was the “good girl.” The helper. The peacemaker. The one who always smiled, said yes, got good grades, and never made a fuss. But what no one knew—what I didn’t even understand myself—was that my stomach was screaming while my mouth stayed silent. In my early teens, I began having strange digestive symptoms.

• Severe period cramps

• Abdominal pain

• Nausea and vomiting

  
  

The doctors said it was just reflux. Sometimes they called it IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome)—a label that explained the symptoms but not the why.

No one asked me what I was holding in.What I was afraid to feel.Or who I was trying so hard to please.

The Link Between IBS Symptoms and Emotional Stress in Girls

Now, as a doctor and a woman who has walked through her own healing, I can finally look back and understand what was happening in my body. I wasn’t just sick. I was overwhelmed.

I grew up in a family structure that was... complicated.There was love—but also silence, tension, and unspoken roles I had to play. I felt like I had to carry the emotional weight of everyone around me. I didn’t know it then, but my nervous system was always on high alert. And my gut was the first to suffer.

What I now know is that IBS in teenage girls is often more than a digestive issue.It’s a nervous system issue.It’s a trauma issue.It’s a “being-too-good-for-too-long” issue.

Why the Gut Speaks When Girls Can’t

Our guts are smart. They’re wired to feel what the rest of us try to ignore.When I couldn’t speak my needs or set boundaries, my gut reacted.When I tried to be the “good girl” instead of the real girl, my gut inflamed.When I kept the peace at the expense of my own peace, my body broke that peace for me.

There’s a reason doctors call the gut the “second brain.”The gut-brain connection means that trauma, stress, and suppressed emotions don’t just make you sad or anxious—they make you sick.

What I Wish Someone Had Told My Mom

Looking back, I wish someone had whispered this to my mother:

"Your daughter is not just sick. She’s overwhelmed. And she’s trying so hard to be perfect that her body had no choice but to fall apart."

If that girl lives in your house, please ask her what’s going on inside her—not just her stomach, but her heart.

How I Finally Started to Heal

My healing didn’t come from just a new diet or medication—though those helped. My real healing began when I realized what was causing my symptoms. I gave myself permission to...

• Say no

• Rest

• Get angry

• Cry

• Stop being the “fixer”

• And start being human

  
  

I founded Hear Her Heal because I know there are thousands of girls—some still teenagers, some now grown women—who are quietly suffering just like I did.

The Bottom Line: Her Gut Is Trying to Tell a Story

If your daughter’s stomach hurts, don’t just change her food. Change the conversation.

Ask:

• What is she afraid to say?

• What role is she playing that’s too heavy for her to carry?

• What would happen if she stopped being perfect?

  
  

These questions could change her life.

They could have changed mine sooner.

Share. Be Heard. Heal.

With love and healing,

Dr. Su