The Ache in My Chest Wasn’t My Heart After All
- Dr. Su
- Sep 4
- 4 min read
Updated: Dec 1
The Ache in My Chest Wasn’t My Heart After All
I remember the nights when I thought my heart was failing me. The sharp pressure, the crushing ache, the racing beats that pulled me into fear. Emergency rooms became a familiar place. I sat under fluorescent lights while my blood was drawn, my heart was scanned, and my body was monitored.
The results were always the same: “Everything looks fine.”
But it didn’t feel fine.
When Tests Say Nothing Is Wrong, But You Still Hurt
As a young woman, I had chest pain so often that it defined whole seasons of my life. Every test had been done — EKGs, echocardiograms, blood work — yet no medical explanation could account for the heaviness in my chest.
If you are reading this because you’ve experienced something similar, hear me clearly: chest pain should always be taken seriously. Serious cardiac conditions must be ruled out first. Go to the emergency room. Get checked. Do not ignore your symptoms.
But if you’ve been through all the tests, and your doctors have told you that your heart is structurally fine, then perhaps it’s time to ask another question:
What if the pain is not in your heart muscle, but in your heartbreak?
My Story: When Stress Became Chest Pain
In medical school, my chest pain grew unbearable. I was far from home, financially strained, and grieving a death in the family. To make matters worse, I discovered my boyfriend at the time was living a double life.
The pain in my chest grew louder. Yet every time I went to the student clinic, the answer was the same: “We can’t find anything wrong.”
Looking back, I see that what I was really searching for wasn’t another test. I was searching for empathy. For someone to look between the lines and say:
She is carrying trauma.
Her emotional wounds are pressing on her chest as surely as any disease.
She doesn’t need another prescription. She needs someone to listen, to hug her, to tell her she’s not alone.
But that never came. And so, like many young women, I learned to push forward through the pain.
What I Learned: How the Body Remembers
Ironically, it was medical school itself that began to save me. As I studied physiology, I began to understand that my chest pain wasn’t a mystery after all. It was stress, grief, betrayal, and loneliness living inside my body.
Science tells us this clearly:
The nervous system responds to stress as if it were life-threatening.
Stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline can cause chest tightness, palpitations, and shortness of breath.
Trauma — especially when unspoken or unseen — imprints itself not only on the mind, but also on the body.
My chest pain wasn’t proof of a failing heart. It was proof of an overwhelmed one.
And here’s the truth: once I started making these connections, the symptoms slowly disappeared. Not overnight, but gradually — so much so that I didn’t even notice at first. My focus had shifted. I was no longer asking, “What is wrong with me?” but instead, “What is my body trying to say?”
If This Is You: Try This
So if you are a young woman who has been to the ER, seen the specialists, and been told: “There’s nothing wrong with your heart,” but you still feel the ache… here’s my invitation to you.
Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with my body?” ask, “What is my body saying about my life?”
Here are three steps to begin:
Pause and listen.Place your hand over your heart. Breathe deeply. Ask yourself, “What is happening in my life right now that feels heavy? What grief, what stress, what unspoken words am I carrying here?”
Journal the voice of your chest pain.Write down: “When my chest hurts, it is trying to tell me…” and let the words flow. You may be surprised what surfaces.
Offer yourself the empathy you were searching for.Sometimes what we need isn’t a diagnosis, but permission to feel. Wrap your arms around yourself. Tell your heart: “I hear you. I won’t ignore you anymore.”
Why This Matters
Unexplained chest pain is not “all in your head.” It is very real. It is the body’s way of crying out for care. Women, especially young women, are often dismissed in medical settings — told they’re anxious, dramatic, or exaggerating.
But the truth is, the body is brilliant. When we ignore our emotional pain, the body speaks louder. Chest pain, headaches, stomach issues — they are not failures of your body. They are messages.
As Dr. Gabor Maté has written, “The question is not why the illness, but why the person.” When we stop asking only what is wrong with the body and start asking what has happened to the person, healing begins.
My Closing Words to You
If you’ve been told “everything is fine” but you know deep down it’s not — please don’t give up. Go to the ER if you need to. Rule out the dangerous conditions. But then, when the tests say your heart is strong, try this:
Listen to the ache.Write down what it’s trying to say.Breathe into it with compassion.
The pain in your chest may not be your heart breaking down. It may be your heart calling out to be heard. And once you begin to listen, you may find the pain softens — because finally, at last, someone is listening.
And I want to invite you to share your story here. This is a space where you can be heard, and in being heard, you can begin to be healed.
With love and healing,
Dr. Su
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